Please Forgive Me

I have been negligent in my writing, and I am truly sorry that I let this portion of my life go unattended for so long.  It is not that I did not have things to say, but the time it takes to capture, package and send them to you is swallowed by the endless cycle of cooking, washing, teaching, and admittedly the OCD mind-numbing stuff I do to try to stay balanced, but also have the tendency to suck up time I feel I should put to more productive use.

Also, there have been a lot of changes in my life.

Last year sucked. 

Last year was a giant Suck-Fest starring leaches, vampires, and massive black holes.

I could recount here a list of ironic misfortune that would leave you indignant and speechless, but I don’t want to bring you down.  Instead, I will tell you that I survived every blow.  The fates combined against me.  They conspired with the universe to beat the $#!+ out of me and succeeded.  Yet even when I have been down for the count and had no desire to continue this sojourn in a world that is so violently dark and hateful that even the institutions and individuals established with the intent to guide and protect the innocent are the very ones causing the most destruction; the light that drives me shines on for the sake of my amazing house-mates.

Spreding Coconut oil rye for some baked "grilled" cheese!
Macey can make lunch!

Learning from my mistakes, I continue to make changes to create a better life for my children and myself.  We decided to home school this year.  It is working so much better than public school ever did, and though we tried the public online school for a short time, we found it to have too many problems to be an effective teaching tool.  In fact, it did more harm than good in Macey’s case, because after getting her all pumped up about all the things she was going to learn in school, the child was bitterly disappointed to spend countless hours chained to the computer reviewing things like PRIMARY COLORS and BASIC BODY PARTS- head, hands, and feet with an interface prone to random malfunction…  She quickly became depressed, anxious, and irritable about school time.  Who could blame her? I despise busy work.  Are there really five year old children in the US who do not know these things?  How is this possible?  Are they raised by animals, or just not taught to speak English?  Either way, my daughter who was already sounding out three letter words should not have to wait for them to catch up especially when she isn’t even really going to school with them!

In my opinion, it makes more sense to give children a more hands on education in what it takes to survive in this world, before they are thrown out into the world.  For thousands of years humanity thrived as children were taught by their families, in their homes and learned to have compassion for and to cooperate with their brother.  The girls currently spend as much in their day learning to cook as a cooperative team as they do learning letters, and often all at the same time:  As it should be.  As it was before the government decided that parents must send their children to public schools to be raised by bullies. (You know who you are.)

Oriel is ready to ride.
Oriel is ready to ride.

The girls and I have several projects in the works to get them engaged in activities that will hopefully inspire their budding interests and abilities which are many.  Thankfully, most of them have been endeavors which I have enough experience in to wing it with a little help from my back-up brain Google.  Though Oriel’s singular request for a skateboard for Xmas had us all slightly perplexed and concerned about how to teach this, I am more thankful than ever for all the You Tube Gurus who take the time to show the world how to do anything because she is certain it is her calling.  A week after her declaration that she wanted to skate, she approached me at the Goodwill, eyes glowing fresh from the magical realm of manifestation realization, skateboard clutched to her chest.  They only wanted a few dollars for it and the new packaging was still on it.  Lilly insisted it was destiny so I let them put it in the cart.  I’ve called a truce with fate.

My littlest princess with the golden locks down to her butt that dance around her like beams of sunlight as she runs off in wild fits of passion thrown randomly if she feels she has been slighted,  wants to also be a skater girl.  I’m ok with it.  I love the confidence she shows in taking on this new talent, and was shocked when we got home with the skateboard and the first thing she did was set it down on it’s wheels, place one foot firmly on the center of the deck, and use her other foot to push herself across the wood floor as though she had been doing this all her life.  Even so, I was probably more delighted than she with the kitty helmet and other protective gear Z gifted her for Xmas, since we are both just guessing about this skate board riding stuff, and she is determined to master it.

Lilly's poem, with a handful of other brilliant submissions selected from hundreds of entries was printed in Accolades.
Lilly the Poet!

Luckily, Lilly’s current interest falls closer to home: Writing.  My little author has actually already stepped up to the plate and knocked it out of the park!  Way back when she attended school, her class submitted poems to a contest, and though she didn’t win, her entry was chosen to be printed in the yearly Accolades book!  I am so honored she let me be her mommy.  All the incredible that she is, is all her, yet it is still my responsibility to help her grow and nurture her gift and with that in mind, we have decided to have go at this blog together.

I’m not even sure how we are going to swing it.  She’s wanted to do this for a while but we are both a little nervous and I’m not sure how to integrate it because anyone who has read my stuff knows I deal with some tough issues that are not always child friendly, but have unfortunately also been a part of my child’s life.  Already her writing is deep, wise, and convincing and I feel she deserves a safe place to stretch her literary wings, but I still want to shelter her a bit because, well- the www is a big scary place.  So I hope you will bear with us as we grow.  Hopefully with two of us working at it we might be able to publish more than two posts this year, but I’m not making any promises because life is weird and unpredictable and I’m still remodeling from last January’s winter water surprise.